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  • Writer's pictureTammy Arlene

Although I am closer to 50 than 40, I always knew I wanted to write. I look at this moment as a Senior in High School, in 1989, as confirmation that I could put words together that others may actually enjoy reading!

I graduated High School shortly after winning this certificate, I had my whole life ahead of me. Instead of writing or going to college, I joined the Marine Corps. I figured I had plenty of time to do everything I ever wanted to do. Life got busy after that, time flew by and I didn't follow my dream. Yes, I wrote little snippets here and there. I hand wrote poems that I tore up and threw away. I started stories, wrote out plot ideas, even wrote 10,000 + words on a handful of novel ideas. Some were good. Some I kept, some are long gone. Maybe a few of these will come back to life someday.

Life got busy and years started flying by. I created a mess for myself and was trying hard to keep it all together. The dream of writing was like a small ember that I kept glowing, but I didn't do anything substantial to fan the flame. Survival as a single mom was my main focus.

Fast forward to January 2015. I faced death (that's a story for another morning) and realized that I may not have a long life ahead of me. I realized that I hadn't followed my heart and done the one thing that would fulfill me. I may never find out if I could make it as an author. Lying in that hospital bed, facing a Whipple surgery, my outcome did not look good. I could see it on the nurse's faces as they lovingly cared for me. I did not know if I would ever discover my true calling. I was afraid. I prayed to God to save me so I could write. I begged.

Obviously, I woke up. Here I am. Except, invincible (or so I thought) I jumped back into my career in sales. I excelled for two years, despite being hospitalized and in critical condition multiple times. I have a room full of sales awards and trophies to prove exactly how invincible I was! Every time I woke up in ICU, I felt like I could handle anything. I had my whole life ahead of me, and all the time in the world. Moving forward to 2017 - the ICU became a very familiar place. The trauma nurses at the local emergency room now know me by sight. In September 2017, I was hospitalized twice. I remember looking up from the gurney (not remembering exactly how I got there) and there were at least 10 people hovering around me, all talking, shouting orders. Strange machines were whirring, rapid transfusion going in my vein, IV's and wires were all over the place. Questions were asked, and so much talking was going on that I panicked. I was floating, my clothes were being removed and I was put in a gown. It was like a dream. Not a good one.

I realized at that moment that I needed to make a change. Two hospitalizations later, (did I mention I am stubborn?) here I am. I am ready. And here I go! Timer set. This novel isn't going to write itself!

Do you need to make a change? Is there a dream you have neglected? Do you want to chat? Comments are welcome, and if you want me to privately pray for you, you can always email me!

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  • Writer's pictureTammy Arlene

Starting this new venture and following my lifelong dream of writing is not only uncomfortable but downright scary! It is my dream, I feel it in my heart. I worry that I do not have everything mapped out in my head. I don’t know the words I will type, or if anyone will be interested enough to read them once they are typed. The act of asking someone to help set up this website caused doubt about my ability to write something worthy of publishing. It brought forward insecurity that I did not know existed. What I am getting at here is - sometimes we have to take a leap of faith to get to where we are meant to be. This is my leap.

I am blessed to have friends and mentors who encourage me, yet the leap is mine to take. The obstacle I am facing is invisible. The self-doubt and insecurity is in my head, and however valid it may feel, I must step over it. If you are reading this, then you know I took a leap of faith and hit publish! I am also leaping and writing daily to finish my first novel, details coming soon. Are your dreams blocked by invisible obstacles? Or is it something more tangible? You are not alone. My dreams have been blocked for years because of a successful career in sales that I was afraid to leave. Can I invite you to join me and take one small step toward your dream? That step may just be writing it down or creating a dream board for the new year. I am working on mine – photo coming in a future post!

Thank you to my family and friends for being patient and believing in me! And I especially give thanks to God for medical miracles, that I am alive and here to write this. That’s a story for another post.

Comments are welcome! Here we go . . .

Hit Publish Already Tammy! DO IT! (am I the only one who writes to herself??) Ok, one more sip of coffee. I’ll order another mocha, and after that, I’ll click publish. Here we go for certain this time.

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